"Lord grant me the strength to change the things I can, the ability to accept the things I can't,
and the wisdom to know the difference between the two."

- Serenity Prayer -

Your goals in this lesson are to identify factors that cause stress, explain the physiological responses to stress and identify appropriate coping mechanisms for dealing with stress.

By the end of this lesson you should be able to:

  1. Identify stressors that affect your health
  2. Define eustress and distress and identify differences between these two types of stress
  3. Identify each of the stages of the General Adaptation Syndrome
  4. Define different coping mechanisms for handling stress
  5. Identify differences between appropriate coping mechanisms and emotionally unhealthy defense mechanisms
  6. Evaluating different stress reduction techniques

We are all impacted by stress on a daily basis as we are bombarded with requests for our time and services. "Can you pick up some milk on your way home." "I need you home by five to watch your little sister." "Can you unload the dishwasher?" Stress is also the result of our inability to fulfill our own expectations of ourselves, or our perceived inability to fulfill other's expectations of us. Oftentimes our perceptions of others' expectations of us are false, but we believe strongly in them, and when we fall short, we dramatically increase our stress levels. For example, when a loved one has a birthday our perception may be that they are expecting an elegant gift, and if we are unable to purchase an elegant gift we are somehow falling short of a perceived expectation; however, our loved one may not hold any expectation of a gift at all, and any token of recognition would have been satisfactory. By clearly identifying our own individual needs and accepting our limitations, we can reduce stress dramatically.

To be successful in managing stress every individual must develop effective coping mechanisms for dealing with stress. At times individuals may rely on defense mechanisms learned in childhood and never deal with stress. The following list identifies common defense mechanisms employed by emotionally unhealthy individuals:

Common Defense Mechanisms
DEFENSE MECHANISM BEHAVIORS EXAMPLE
Repression Forgetting unpleasant thoughts, memories or feelings. An individual suppresses the memory of being abused.
Rationalization Making up excuses for a past uncomfortable event or behavior. A student makes up excuses for failing an exam.
Denial Refusing to acknowledge unpleasant experiences. A person does not accept the fact that s/he has a terminal illness.
Projection Repressing one's thoughts, feelings or urges and attributing them to someone else. A person who represses the desire to have an affair accuses his or her lover of being unfaithful.
Displacement Redirecting a dangerous impulse from the real threat toward a safer, substitute target. An abused wife does not fight back, but abuses her child instead.
Regression Reducing anxiety by acting immature to feel more secure. An adult begins to act childish to avoid the stigma associated with aging..
Avoidance Taking an action that prevents situations that produce powerful feelings. A woman will not date because she is afraid of falling in love.
Alters/Schiff Essential Concepts for Healthful Living

 

Emotionally healthy individuals learn a variety of appropriate coping mechanisms to deal with stress. The following is a list of things emotionally healthy individuals do to avoid or cope with stress:

  • Manage their time
    • keep an updated calendar
    • allocate a specific amount of time to perform responsibilities, e.g. 1 hour per day for exercise, 1 hour per day for reading. (If they are unable to find enough time to perform a responsibility, they reduce the amount of time on it or eliminate it.)
  • Set realistic yet challenging goals
    • identify long term and short term goals
    • break long term goals into smaller more manageable goals
    • plan a reward for accomplishing a goal
  • Make lists
  • Prioritize things to do
  • Be assertive
  • Learn to say "no"
  • View stressors as opportunities rather than hindrances
  • Realize that stress can be utilized as a positive force and an opportunity to grow emotionally, mentally, spiritually, etc.

Try out one or all of these stress surveys to determine your individual level of stress.

Stress Sources Input Form

Distress Symptoms Input Form

Stress Balancing Strategies Input Form

To learn more about stress and coping mechanisms follow these links:

The American Institute of Stress
Stress Inc.
Stress Management
Progressive Relaxation
Tai Chi
Transcendental Meditation
Yoga